National Coming Out Day

Hey you gays!

So yesterday was National Coming Out day. The day to tell those selected people that you're gay, or indeed tell them your "coming out story".

I'll start you off with the lovely Portia de Rossi's take on the whole situation.

[My sexuality is] a part of me that I really like. But it's not the totality of me. It's not a passion of mine to become political in any way, but I do think it's important to see gay men and women having big careers and very full, rich lives.

(Source | AfterEllen)

Amen. I personally agree with every word.

Okay, my turn.

I knew I was gay from the time I was around 8 years old. It wasn't until I was 14 that I got my first girlfriend and told my closes friends that I was attracted to women, but they accepted it straight away and didn't give it a second though. (I guess that's just my generation). I must have been around 16 when my parents found out.

My Mother, bless her, caught me watching The L Word, and asked me if I was gay. When I said yes, she reacted in a bad way. She came home from work crying on several occasions, and my Dad said it made him feel sick. Out of guilt, I told her I was kidding, and I went back in the closet for another year.

However, I couldn't stay in there for long - it wasn't who I was. Playing "straight" wasn't my forte, even if I did look kinda femme. This time, they were much more angry about it. Not upset, but angry. But after time, I introduced my parents to a girl I was in a serious relationship with.

They didn't like it, but they accepted it. They even let her stay over at my house; something that a couple of years previously wouldn't have even been an option.

So my "story" isn't the most thrilling and it's filled with passive aggressive homophobia, but it's still mine. I'm so proud of my parents now, because they accept me for who I am.

Which reminds me: it does get better.

Now it's your turn.

Tell me your coming out stories below! Maybe yours is funnier or happier than mine.

Don't be shy!

Because All Lesbians Are Ugly.

Can anyone remember when I informed you about Ladyhawke coming out?

Well, in the comments, I received quite a few relatively rude remarks about all lesbians being ugly. Of course, we've all heard the "she's only gay because no men want her" statement.

So I wanted to show you all that this is not the case.

Many, many gay women are extremely hot. Here are a few.

Portia De Rossi.

The other half of the world's most famous lesbian, Ellen DeGeneres, Portia is definitely hot. Is she gay? Yes. Could she get possibly any man in the world? Yes. Suck on that.

Chely Wright.

Also easy on the eyes is country singer, Chely. No one gets invited to pose in their underwear for FHM if they're not nice to look at, right?

Not to mention there are some pretty gorgeous bisexual ladies out there too: Angelina Jolie, Drew Barrymore and Anna Paquin to name but a few.

I'm not trying to typecast all the feminine queer women as the 'hot ones', but of course to a bigoted, heterosexual male, the only ones worth looking at are the girly ones. They're generally all too shallow to look at the boyish cuteness of Ellen DeGeneres, Tegan & Sara and Rachel Maddow.

Finally, as a request, I've been asked to post a picture of myself, the writer of this blog, for you all to judge whether or not I'm ugly myself.

I'm not bisexual, or straight, I'm simply a lesbian. But am I ugly? Do you think I'm incapable of attracting male attention? You decide.

Lesbian Clichés (Part 2)

It's back! After popular demand, I've gone ahead and written 'Lesbian Clichés (Part 2)' a week early. Let's get cracking, shall we?

Cliché numero Seis: Tank Tops.

That's right, if you're thinking "well straight people wear them too!" - I know! I FREAKIN' KNOW! But what is a tell-tale sign when recognizing a dyke on the prowl? A tank top. a.k.a. 

Wifebeater! 

Yeah, yeah, the woman above is not a lesbo. But she is so hot. ;)

You will, however, find many famous lesbians including Cathy DeBuono and Jenny Shimizu wearing them. Chances are, if you're out in a bar or a nightclub, the girls in the tank tops are the gay ones! You can even get awesome lesbian themed versions for yourself at CafePress. (Like the one below!)

Cliché numero siete: U-Haul.

U-Haul? If you're a lesbian and reading this, I'm guessing you know what I'm talking about. For you non-lesbians, I'll explain...

U-Haul (also known as 'the lesbian urge to merge') is when a lesbian couple decide they are going to move in together after knowing each other for only a short time - sometimes even only a couple of weeks!

For example, my girlfriend and I have been seeing each other for 5 months now, and we have already decided we're going to buy an apartment together in London, have at least one child (that she will be carrying) and maybe get a pet cat/dog. All this in five months? Not that I'd know, but I'm sure most straight couples would be totally freaked out by this notion at only 5 months...

On that note, does anyone know why this is? How come lesbians decide this stuff so quickly?

Cliché numero ocho: Ties.

Perhaps made more mainstream by The L Word's Shane (Kate Moennig), ties are a dead give away when spotting a lesbian.

Again, no idea why this is, but dykes (especially soft butches) tend to wear ties a lot. Not to look smart or presentable, perhaps just to look cool? Whatever, it works!

Cliché numero nueve: Being Butch.

Now I'm not saying all lesbians are butch, I'm saying that straight people think all lesbians are butch.

Now I know this is factually inaccurate - I myself am a HUGE femme. Right now, I'm wearing Barbie pink nail polish and girly eyeliner, so why is this a preconceived notion among straight people? Maybe we should show them some real femmes. Or haven't they heard of Portia De Rossi?

Cliché numero diez: Gay Bumper Stickers!

So they're not exclusive to lesbians, but to gays in general. I guess they're just our little way of letting other gays know!

Aww, doesn't it look pretty? You know you want a gay bumper sticker... Unless you already have one... And if you do, get more! MOAR!

And that's it! I'm sure there are hundreds more. If you think of any, let me know and I'll think about put a 'part 3' together. Until next time!

Jill Bennett

I realized earlier this week when I was reading UK lesbian magazine DIVA that I don't blog about Jill Bennett enough.

Now usually, when you ask a dyke who her favorite all-time lesbian is, they'd probably answer 'Ellen!' or 'Rosie!' But to be honest, I'd have to say Jill.

So she's not as well known as Portia or Leisha, but she's high up on my own personal 'inspiration' list: she's talented - Jill played Michelle on season 3 of here! TV's Dante's Cove and the infectious Andrea on lesbian comedy web series 3way - she's absolutely gorgeous, and she actually cares about the world, in particular, one of my all-time favorite topics, gay rights.

Currently dating SheWired's Cathy DeBuono, Jill recently protested outside the mormon church that funded anti-gay proposition 8 for the way in which gay people are now classed as second class citizens in California. (Below.) This is just one of the many things Bennett has done for gay welfare, as well as sharing her life with the lesbian community - both on SheWired and AfterEllen.com - ensuring people everywhere that being gay really is ok.

For constant personal updates on Jill, follow her on Twitter: twitter.com/jillbennett14.
Alternatively, click over to SheWired.com for Jill's current video blogs or go to her MySpace page at MySpace.com/JillBennett.

I personally think she's one to watch out for: she's certainly impressed me over the past few years.

Top Lesbian News of 2008.

Firstly, I'm gonna say Happy Holidays to all you lovely ladies! Whether it's Christmas, Hanukkah or something else, I hope you have a good one!

As 2008 is drawing to a close, I was thinking about the best lesbian/bisexual news throughout the year. What would be in your list of top 5 lesbian headlines?

How about 'Portia becomes Mrs. DeGeneres?'


It's great when a lesbian couple are as mainstream as Ellen DeGeneres and wife Portia De Rossi, but when it is big news that an openly gay couple are getting married, it just makes me feel even more proud to be a raving homosexual.

Contrastingly, amongst your list of biggest gay headlines in 2008 may be the passing of proposition 8 in California; abolishing the rights of marriage to homosexual couples in one of America's biggest states.

However, the passing of this discriminative law is not all bad: it pushed actress and comedian Wanda Sykes to officially come out of the closet once and for all.

Since she came out, Wanda ensured the both gay and straight communities that she was 'proud to be a black woman, and proud to be gay.' Recently married in California whilst it was legal, Sykes hated the fact that her rights were being stripped away and she has given many inspirational speeches to gay audiences since.

Talking of being stripped away, take Grey's Anatomy. Yes, Grey's Anatomy, which frequently displays gay story-lines and even has a gay actor (T.R. Knight) among the cast, recently took away one of the shows best loved characters, Erica Hahn, without so much as a goodbye.

Brooke Smith (below left, with on-screen lover Sara Ramirez, who plays Callie Torres on the show) was fired from Grey's with no explanation, to many lesbians' disappointment. Some people even began petitioning for the return of the couple!

So what do you guys think? What has been the best - and worst - lesbian and bisexual news this year? And do you think next year will be just as action packed?